Part of the Pyramid

I cannot say I have ever been excited over large amounts of meat. I shy away from portions that one could describe as a "hunk" or "slab". The chances are much too high to find other non-meat-related items within that sort of quantity. Crunching on texture that is "tight" or chewing on what appears to be a cross-section of macaroni has led me to become a closet-vegetarian. In fact, it was as recently as this year that my wife discovered that I would skip over fruit to find the vegetable platter. Fruit are much too troublesome. I had to follow a 7-step process to de-seed a pomegranate today. And I thought bananas were complicated. The "simple" (one step to eat) fruit, let's say blueberries, are "best" when found in the deep bush and only when you wrestle them from the maw of a black bear. Even then they are a minefield of tart duds. My wife prompts me to find ones of particular texture and colour, but let's be honest, by that point it is a Russian-roulette of face-melting acerbity or mushy sweetness. Nature's candy is not all it is cracked up to be.

Having been my birthday recently, I purchased Mario Kart Wii (thanks Mom and Dad!). Moms of the world rejoiced as Nintendo finally created a game that would recognize their frantic leaning and swinging of the remote pad. Steering with the controller definitely adds a visceral feel to the whole experience, but a highlight of the game is to play other racers online. Knowing that I've tightened the grip of remote pads in the hands of people in Alberta, UK, and as far as Japan is really neat. Of course it goes the other way as well in that it is even more frustrating to lose to a human opponent. No matter how anonymous that person is (curse you "Koko11"!!). I grew up in the tail end of the video arcade era. I remember placing quarters above the buttons above Player 2 to challenge the current player to a match. Mario Kart brings that competitive feel back as you draft past that blasted punk that had nailed you with a red shell. What fun!These seem neat. Maybe I could eventually program my feet to walk to work a bit more briskly. Unfortunately, like most robotic devices in the future, I'm sure they will collectively "malfunction" and walk human kind into traffic, tar pits, and volcanoes. Or live tapings of The View.